Have I mentioned lately that I’m glad I’m not a Canadian? No offense to my neighbors to the north, but they’ve taken woke political correctness to levels of absurdity that would make even the farthest-to-the-left lefty here in the states blush. Which is saying a lot because they have no shame!

From the Ottawa Citizen:

This handy catalogue of words and terms that are offensive to the ultra-sensitive ear is educational indeed. It offers dozens of examples of troublesome terms in its beyond-satire attempt to prevent police officers from offending anyone, anywhere, ever.

There are too many to detail here, but let’s start with the low-hanging fruit. No, sorry. There’s a problem right there. Apparently the words “low-hanging fruit” no longer refer just to fruit that’s easy to reach or something that’s simple to do. Instead, the guide advises, “This metaphor refers to the lynching of Black people and should not be used.”

Who knew? Not former Ottawa police chief Peter Sloly, who used the terribly offensive phrase during his testimony at the Emergencies Act inquiry. Clearly, the former chief is not a language guru.

And there we go again. “The word guru is an appropriation from Hindu and Buddhist religions,” the guide advises and as such, should not be used nonchalantly. The same for the word mantra.

Cultural appropriation is quite an issue in the view of those who put together the guide. That is a problem for the English language since it so liberally adopts words from other cultures. Thus, powwow, lone wolf, spirit animal and even tribe are out. Chief, curiously, is OK. The guide contends that tribe is an appropriation of Indigenous culture, which will surprise those aware of the use of the term in cultures around the world.

There’s more if you click the link, but you get the point. They’ve went beyond absurd to literal insanity. In fact, after reading this, I think the entire country needs a lobotomy.

Or a labootamy, as the Canadians would say.